Please read Part One first.
November 5 2024. Or Table Tennis Tuesday.
Under tight security 500 fans representing all fifty states would file into Beloit’s Battleground Arena. A national lottery chose a mix of half Treump and half Kamalatte supporters who would have the opportunity to attend this extraordinary venue. To avoid any over run of security, thick plexiglass panels separated the fans from the candidates. With a chill in the air, fans grabbed a Karamel Kama-latte or a Pumpkin Head spice outside before entering. FIX News and MESS-NBC would broadcast the event globally in what would be the most viewed event in history.
Only the running mates and immediate family would accompany the candidates into the arena. Due to questions of impartiality, no human official would be present. Five HD video cameras were mounted around the sides and above the table. Artificial intelligence would keep score and review any points challenged by the players. Via satellite, super computers at Argonne National Labs would receive and process the information, then determine the result.
Outside, security was extremely tight. A convoy of limousines and one garbage truck approached the arena. Treump, at the advice of the secret service was not in the passenger seat of the truck. In the rear, securely mounted inside the trash collection compartment was a custom portable tanning bed. Inside was the ex-President, doing some last minute toning.The vehicles pulled up right next to a secure service entrance. Kamalatte entered conservatively dressed in gray sweatpants and white t-shirt adorned with a large rainbow on the front as one side of the arena erupted in cheers. For nearly ten minutes Kamalatte and the spectators waited, and waited. Finally, in a red, white, and blue cape, Treump emerged with a white mask covering his face. His supporters roared and it was time for the candidates to warm up. Treump still donned his cape and mask, half-heartedly batting back balls and gesturing to the crowd. The five minute warm-up ended, and both players retreated to their respective chairs on opposite sides of the table. One major change to the match was reducing it to the best of seven vs the best of eleven, which would certainly benefit the older and possibly less fit Treump….hmmm.
A loud buzzer resonated throughout the building. It was game on. Trump removed has garb and mask,. To the amazement of the fans and Kamalatte, he was glowing so intensely that Kamalatte was squinting. His MAGA covered orange t-shirt and shorts matched his luminescent skin. As the pair stepped up to the table, Kamalatte would serve, but was trying to shield her eyes with her hand. The fans, devoid of all but essentials, had no sunglasses to offer. Tim Walz searched frantically through his suit jacket pockets…and bingo, a crumpled up pair of paper solar eclipse glasses from the March eclipse! He tossed them over to his running mate.
Now, Kamalatte had the opposite problem, seeing the little white ball. She could see Treump’s glowing right arm and used that to help follow the barely visible ball. Kamalatte’s spinning serves were flummoxing Treump, but when he got the ball in play, his fast flat old school punch shots were too fast for the visually compromised VP to see and react to. Treump, now ahead in games 2-0 and leading 8-4 in the third, adjusted the diminutive microphone taped to his chest. He continued boasting to the millions who paid for the premium service to hear his real time worldwide commentary of the match…courtesy of Elong Muskie and his Starlunk Satellite Network.
As Kamalatte’s glasses flopped up and down, she noticed the bright orange glow was diminishing. She removed the spectacles, stared her opponent in the eye, and confidently tossed them near her chair. As her eyes adjusted, Treump continued to capitalize on his waning advantage and took game three. In a savvy move, Kamalatte took an allotted five minute timeout as time would be on her side.
The pair returned to the table with the now less luminescent candidate one game from the presidency. Kamalatte was now able to display her more aggressive style and attacked from both wings. Treump’s coach had focused on blocking these attacks and this kept him viable, along with adapting to Kamalatte’s serves, but a new wild card emerged…conditioning. Treump was huffing and puffing, unable to voice any commentary and succumbed three consecutive games.
Treump took his five minute timeout, and on the first point of the final and decisive game, he appeared to roll an ankle and called for a trainer. After some spray and bandaging, and the five minute injury timeout, Treump was refreshed. It was rock-em sock-em robot time as the pair exchanged points. With the game in overtime at 12-11 in Treump’s favor, he extended out his right and angled a shot that glanced off the right side of the table. Was it a winning edge shot, or a side miss? AI called it a miss, and thus a tie game. Treump raised his hand to challenge the call where further review would take the video to be analyzed at Argonne. The lab is forty miles away, but microseconds in bits and bytes time, so the decision should be quick.
Inexplicably, the decision lingered and the replay appeared slightly different from what naked eyes experienced. In two minutes the decision came down, the shot was good. Cheers and boos echoed loudly. Treump was President. Speculation was that Elong had intercepted and re-digitized the transmission.
